The Sharks side named to face the Cheetahs in Bloemfontein this weekend contains some strange selections to say the least. With both Willem Alberts and Jean Deysel named on the bench, the stating loose forward combination has an incredibly lightweight look to it and it’s an area the Cheetahs pack will look to exploit in the first half.
The tight five has been left mostly intact after last week’s game, with the exception of Alistair Hargreaves, who misses out altogether after injuring his calf. Ross Skeate comes in to the number 5 jersey to partner Steven Sykes, while no lock forward replacement has been named. Alberts will presumably be pressed into service in the second row if required, but exactly what the reasoning for that is, is unclear. Ryan Kankowski comes straight back in at number 8, while Keegan Daniel’s reward for some superb performances at the back of the scrum is a move to the unfamiliar blindside flank position; one where he has always struggled.
Beast Mtawarira comes back into the squad in the number 17 jersey and will be one of three front-rankers on the wood, as both Eugene van Staden and Kyle Cooper are also retained.
The backline looks a lot more familiar, with Steve Meyer back at flyhalf and Monty Dumond falling out of the squad entirely. Ruan Pienaar will cover both halfback position from the bench, meaning that Rory Kockott also drops out, with Andries Strauss the only other back on the bench.
There is no sign of either of the du Plessis brothers, or Odwa Ndungane. I’m sorry, but I simply don’t buy this team. I’m convinced that it’s a ruse and will be changed shortly before kick-off.
Sharks v Cheetahs:
15. Louis Ludik
14. JP Pietersen
13. Stefan Terblanche (Capt)
12. Patrick Lambie
11. Lwazi Mvovo
10. Steve Meyer
9. Charl McLeod
8. Ryan Kankowski
7. Keegan Daniel
6. Jacques Botes
5. Ross Skeate
4. Steven Sykes
3. Wiehahn Herbst
2. Craig Burden
1. Patric Cilliers
Replacements
16. Kyle Cooper
17. Tendai Mtawarira
18. Eugene van Staden
19. Willem Alberts
20. Jean Deysel
21. Ruan Pienaar
22. Andries Strauss
.gif)
I like the consistency in the backline.
I hope you are right Rob, I hope for an adjustment in the loosies.
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 1) : well, either way. Maybe we run them to pieces in the first half, then bring on the big guns to stop the turnovers in the second? Maybe it could work, but it just seems strange.
That’s not how I would have selected the loosies, but the rest of it, I’m happy with.
@robdylan (Comment 2) : It seems to be a big chance to take, they could run away with it in the first half..
I’m allready having nightmares about this game
“the stating loose forward combination has an incredibly lightweight look to it and it’s an area the Cheetahs pack will look to exploit in the first half.”
And with our reserves, we will exploit the Cheetahs in the second.
have faith ye of little faith.
I nearly posted this team, but Rob was too quick for me, not happy about the loose trio, it’s VERY unbalanced.
I don’t know why you would select two props and two loosies on the bench and completely leave out lock cover. I know alberts can play there, but I was actually hoping he would start the game in place of Botes or Keegan. He gave us major go forward once he replaced Rhodes after 20min last week. The Sharks will be missing that against the Cheetahs. It will be interesting to see how we play the game, we’ll have to keep it away from the contact quite a bit with this team.
If Keegan Daniel and Willem Alberts swapped positions, I would be happy with the squad
@Letgo (Comment 8) : why not have Rhodes on the bench or even starting? I’m not convinced alberts has the height to play lock
Personally I think we must nail them in the 1st half, whaty if we are not able to “exploit” them in the 2nd?? Be PRO-active, not RE-active?? Just my humble opinion. Should stick with the team that have done the service thus far…again IMHO.
I would much prefer having Alberts in for Daniel – we need a bit of grunt in the loosie dept.
@war1 (Comment 10) : Vic looked ok at lock in the Super 14, but it’s not where you want to have him.
Agree that Alberts should be starting for Daniel. Or leave Daniel at 8 and put Hoff on the bench with Deysel
@Ice (Comment 11) : it IS the same team bar the loosies, which may prove to be our achilles heel
3 names to think about:
Hendro Scholtz
Juan Smith
Ashley Jonson
’nuff said. Let’s hope we can still catch up by the time Plum brings the big boys on.
@robdylan (Comment 13) : I think for scrums he will be OK, he’s a big strong lad but lineouts and kick-offs, we need height
problem here is Plum picking players based on seniority, rather than suitability.
@robdylan (Comment 15) : O blikskottel, we will be bossed in the rucks until the proper blindsides come on
I’m so glad that Marshall’s change their add to depicting Kanko. Got enough of watching De Waal.
@war1 (Comment 14) : if it is the same team, bar the loosies, it aint exactly the same team….is it?
We are going battle in this game..
Beast on the bench is a good idea..
Kanko should have been on the bench with Alberts starting, then Alberts could be replaced by deysel to keep the size..
Bloem is not a place to play catch-up rugby, eish
@war1 (Comment 14) : i must be honest I would feel better with Botes – Deysel – Alberts combination. Kanko can do his running in the second half when we are 20 ahead.
@Ice (Comment 20) : almost then, maybe
It’s a pity that I already made my Superbru picks.It would have been differant had I seen the team first
@rekinek (Go Klose!) (Comment 23) : Deysel is just coming back from injury, I would be reluctant to start with him
@Pokkel (Comment 25) : you mean you would reduce sharks win from 30 to 3
@war1 (Comment 22) : I am SO with you on that point..
@rekinek (Go Klose!) (Comment 27) : more like my 5 point win to a 15 point loss
I picked the Cheetahs to win . . . by mistake. I was genuinely surprised to see my superbru picks.
well, glad to see we all agree
@war1 (Comment 30) : Yeah right
@Pokkel (Comment 32) : no jokes, I almost never pick the Sharks to lose. I think there is a glitch in the system, or with my PC
@Ice (Comment 20) : Don’t be picky, it’s exactly the same, with just a few changes
This is bollocks!!!
No lock reserve and not the right loosie combo.
Cheetahs by 8 here me say.
@Greg (Comment 34) : Don’t men get the concept of blueprint???
If this combo starts it’s going to feel like Brisbane all over again
It’s not being picky, its being pedantic and semantic and most importantly…RIGHT and CORRECT! LOL
@Pokkel (Comment 37) :
I’m hoping Keegan proves me wrong…again, but I just don’t think he’s the right guy to play against a strong cheetahs side like this. I would have much rather wanted him on the bench to come on 30min or 20min after the Cheetah loosies have been smashed a little by Alberts.
I also think Beast would have been a good starting option with these lightweight loosies, since he almost play’s like a fourth loosie, but in a more fetcher-like role. Herbst and to a lesser extent Cilliers has been keeping themselves a little scarce when it comes to ruck time. This week Botes will have to take 50% of the cleaning with Sykes and the rest of the forwards taking the rest…or will we see more backs having to commit themselves to this area?
I don’t think this is a smart team, I know he wants to reward his players for form, but then he should have left Kanko on the bench with Deysel and kept Keegan at 8, because really moving him to 7 can’t be reward for playing well at 8.
doesn’t seem fair to be slating Keegan like this when he’s been one of the form players of the first three rounds. Still, this combo just plain does not look right.
PDV will be bleak that Plum is playing Kanko out of position!
@Letgo (Comment 40) : I swear, Letgo, you understand rugby better than John Plumtree does. And I mean that very seriously.
@Ice (Comment 36) : The only blue that most men ever get the concept of has nothing whatsoever to do with printing
@Oubaas2009 (Comment 42) : LOL
@robdylan (Comment 41) : keegan has been one of our best players, it’s not his fault plum is playing him out of position and has selected an unbalanced loose trio
@robdylan (Comment 31) : Okay, so how do we get Plumtree to see this. I think it should go on record that every time we (Sharksworld) don’t agree with his selections the Sharks end up losing. And every time he finally makes the selections we’ve (Sharksworld) been calling for weeks, the Sharks make a surprise comeback.
@Letgo (Comment 47) : Thus far, I have resisted the temptation to use his email address, even though I know what it is…
@Oubaas2009 (Comment 42) : Not sure about that, pdv doesn’t really understand the concept of a player’s preferred position
@Greg (Comment 44) :…or rugby.. :rol:
@Letgo (Comment 40) : thge changes will be coming quickly ..
@robdylan (Comment 43) : I’m putting that on my resume when I go to apply for the job.
In any loose trio you need a Deysel/Alberts/Rhodes type player. Big ball carrying hard man. I would expect to see one of them start. Think Plum may be doing an Ian Mac here and change the ‘team’ before kickoff. Unless he has been listening to our esteemed national coach, in which case anything is possible.
@Letgo (Comment 52) : I’ll write a more glowing reference on request
@robdylan (Comment 48) : You can always pass it on to me, I am less disciplined!
@Oubaas2009 (Comment 53) : If he does make the last minute change then I think it’s a good ploy, because if even we are this confused imagine what the Cheetahs must be thinking. It must be in their minds a little. I’m hoping that’s all it is from Plum. Mind Games.
@Ice (Comment 55) :
me too… 
@Letgo (Comment 56) : so I hope we see a surprise inclusion of Bismarck and Jannie as well.
@robdylan (Comment 54) :
@Letgo (Comment 59) : I’ll make you a deal… I’ll be CEO and you be the coach
@robdylan (Comment 58) : maybe he learnt this trick in his upskilling courses?
I was hoping Bismarck would play this weekend even if it’s just of the bench.
Go Cheetahs!!!
Sharks by 15pts!!!!!
@war1 (Comment 61) : the jury is still out on whether he actually learnt anything! Did hug reece-edwards go along? If there’s a cretin that need up-skilling it is that failure HRE
@Megatron (Comment 64) : You feeling OK Mega…I recon you need to phone your doctor right now before it gets worse..
geez louise, what a bunch of doomsday prophets. Lucky none of you play the game, or you’d lose it in your mind before you’ve even played.
I think this website should change from sharksworld.co.za to doomsday.co.za
Thank the Lord its Phuza Thursday, going to need a couple cold ones to reduce the sweating that has started since reading the team sheet… Eish, the Cheetahs must be licking their lips…
Good to see Skeate getting a run-on, pity its at the expense of Hargreaves – anyone know when Mostert will be back??
We will win if we arrive with the mentality that this is going to be a hectic game that we need to play wisely!
Come on Sharks!
@Pokkel (Comment 66) : if they lose then they’re really k@k
@Megatron (Comment 64) :
@chaz (Comment 70) : hey chazzie baby! If there was a kiss smiley here i would put on you!
I hope its just a ruse concerning the loosies tho something tells me it’s not!
@Megatron (Comment 71) : oh my u are so full of yr self
Rob can u please tell me what happened to all my smileys they are gone!!?
@chaz (Comment 74) :
ok back on and thanks 
@robdylan (Comment 60) : Well, if you’re CEO, that would be up to you, right? I’ll take that deal, we agree on mostly everything…eventually. I think we’ll make an excellent team.
@Letgo (Comment 76) : Geez! Get a room you two!
Jealous, Ice? You can handle PR, if you like!
@Ice (Comment 77) :
oh my i don’t think that Mrs O is going to like that and then what about SW 
@robdylan (Comment 78) : oh my now that is going for a 3 what about me just old CHAZING
what can me do sth please
@robdylan (Comment 78) : I have no idea what you guys are on about?!
@robdylan (Comment 78) : Off course I am jealous! LOL
Okay…I will settle for PR..as long as my office is next to yours, okay??
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 81) : Rob is two-timing me with Letgo…now he is offerinh me a position as the Sharks PR , so I can zip the lip!
@Ice (Comment 83) : Shame Ice.. how dare he?!?!
At least you got it right by getting yourself a cushy job
@Ice (Comment 77) : I guess we were asking for that.
@Letgo (Comment 85) : You had it coming, yes! LOL
You girls make this site very interesting..
@robdylan (Comment 60) : Got a position for me there as Flasher Girl fitness instructor Rob? You know I`ll follow a ” hands on approach” . . .
Maybe poach some Felions, we`ll use the money we save on Ruans` salary now
I`m in Durban next week if you want to discuss details!
@Original Pierre (Comment 89) :
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 88) : I guess that’s why we get paid per comment for our efforts!
@Ice (Comment 91) : You get paid to comment?!
Where do I submit my invoice?! I`ve got loads of billable hours here!
@Ice (Comment 91) : If only.. lol
@Original Pierre (Comment 89) : you think I live in durban?
@Original Pierre (Comment 92) : Off course I get paid, it’s hard work coming up with the crap I do!
Sorry, but to my knowledge, it’s only fe-supporters who get paid…
@robdylan (Comment 94) : You’ll have to move if you wanna be CEO..
@Original Pierre (Comment 89) : that pic of your tell’s me excatly what you meant in that comment
@Ice (Comment 95) : I hope you are declaring all this extra income?!
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 93) : How else do you think would I b able to afford my Lamborgini??
@robdylan (Comment 94) : he’ll hv to buy a air ticket to go and c you
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 98) : hey! I am registered as a non-profitable organisation! **clever blonde**
@Ice (Comment 99) : What colour are you getting? lol!
@Ice (Comment 101) : Now that is clever
How can i contribute to this organisation?!
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 102) : Black..it’s the new black.
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 103) : and u are still asking oh my
@Ice (Comment 104) : Once you go black..
@Ice (Comment 104) : i thought so much was about to say Black and White but left to c what you will say
@chaz (Comment 107) : A Lambo has to be a flashy colour..
Yellow or green would be my choice
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 106) : mmmm but will always be SW blondie
Shit why does my smileys always take so long to appear after i comment
@chaz (Comment 109) : Its slow on my side as well..
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 108) : yes but red goes all the way if you know what i mean the girls go mad about red and well yellow to
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 96) : I think I could swing that
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 110) : thanks i thought it was me
@robdylan (Comment 112) : eeeeaaahhhhhh
now thats what i call a good CEO
@chaz (Comment 111) : Red is also a good colour! But that is more the Ferrari colour..
@robdylan (Comment 112) : Rob why is the smileys taking so long to appear?
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 115) : true but still a good looking colour and that green what kind of green
@chaz (Comment 117) : A bright lumo lime green..
@Letgo (Comment 120) : I found the loophole.
I am flashy enough, the Lambo is just an accesory…so no need to go flashy. BWHAHAHA!
@Letgo (Comment 120) : lol.. are you just showing off the use of smileys which Chaz can’t see..
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 119) : now u are talking it will look great that my kind of green
@Ice (Comment 122) : agree but the colour will do the rest
@Ice (Comment 122) : Nice come back.. 10 points to you!!
@chaz (Comment 124) : Green is not proper green if it doesnt glow in the dark
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 123) : i c the 2 smileys or are there
sth that i don’t see 
it just takes so dame long to get the smileys to appear
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 126) : oh so you like to glowwwww in the dark for the CHICKS do you
@chaz (Comment 128) : lol..
ok back to the game now do you really all think the sharks will take this win home
@chaz (Comment 128) : What can i say.. i like the ladies.. hahaha
@chaz (Comment 130) : I hope so.. I have a feeling they might just pull it out the hat..
ho hum ho hum
@robdylan (Comment 133) : Say what?
@robdylan (Comment 133) : @Ice (Comment 134) : Soo verveeld op n Vrydag lyk dit my
Almal sit en wag vir die rugby om te begin..
@Pokkel (Comment 135) : Maybe we should re-introduce the Friday Funnies thread?
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 136) : en dis moewies stil by di werk…very strange for month-end..
@Ice (Comment 138) : Ek het dag af gevat.. so dis lekker stil by die huis..
@Ice (Comment 137) : not a bad idea….I can’t remember the last time I heard a REALLY funny joke.
hey – anyone got any funnies? Feel free to put them up.
The only thing funny I can think of is the Sharks loose trio and it’s only really funny if you’re a Cheetahs supporter
@robdylan (Comment 141) :
@Pokkel (Comment 142) : I need to write an article about that, but it depresses me too much
Go CHEETAHS!!!
@wpw (Comment 144) : krap jy alweer waar dit ni jeuk ni, Westerling??
@Ice (Comment 145) :
Hey Ice ol buddy ol pal!!
Good to see you again!!
@wpw (Comment 144) : that wasn’t funny yesterday and it’s even less funny today.
Don’t you have a hair appointment or something to go to? Or maybe a date with an all-you-can-eat buffet?
@Pokkel (Comment 140) :
The US Army is closing in on Bin Laden.
@robdylan (Comment 147) : I LOVE BANTER!!
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice in reviving her husband’s libido.
‘What about trying Viagra?’ asked the doctor.
‘Not a chance’, she said. ‘He won’t even take an aspirin.’
‘Not a problem,’ replied the doctor. ‘Give him an ‘Irish Viagra’. It’s when you drop the Viagra tablet into his coffee. He won’t even taste it… Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.’
It wasn’t a week later when she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to her progress. The poor dear exclaimed, ‘Oh, faith, goodness gracious me! It was horrid! Just terrible, doctor!’
‘Really? What happened?’ asked the doctor.
‘Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and with
his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent me cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there passionately on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!’
‘Why so terrible?’ asked the doctor, ‘Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn’t good?’
‘Fook me, no no no, it was the best sex I’ve had in 25 years! But sure as I’m sittin here, I’ll never be able to show me face in Mugg ‘n Bean again!’
@wpw (Comment 146) : Wish I could say “likewise”
JK!
@robdylan (Comment 147) :
@robdylan (Comment 147) :
Get it right: today is nails and lips day!
Shazaam!
@VanWilder (Comment 150) : Hahaha…
@VanWilder (Comment 150) :
@Big Fish (Comment 152) : BaZINGa
My neighbour found out that her dog ( a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog’s ears. He cleaned both ears, and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that, if she wanted to keep this from recurring, she should go to the chemist and get some “Nair” hair remover and rub it in the dog’s ears once a month.
The lady went to the chemist and bought some “Nair” hair remover.
At the register, the pharmacist told her, “If you’re going to use this under your arms, don’t use deodorant for a few days.”
The lady said, “I’m not using it under my arms.”
The pharmacist said, “If you’re using it on your legs, don’t shave for a couple of days.”
The lady replied, “I’m not using it on my legs either. If you must know, I’m using it on my Schnauzer.”
The pharmacist says, “Well stay off your bicycle for about a week.”
A guy walks into a post office one day and sees a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter, methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying the scent all over them.
His curiosity getting the better of him, he approaches the balding man and asks him what he’s doing.
The man says, “I’m sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?’”
“But why?” asks the man.
“I’m a divorce lawyer,” the man replies.
One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a
Christmas gift…
The next year, he didn’t buy her a gift.
When she asked him why, he replied, “Well, you still haven’t used the gift
I bought you last year!”
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
_______
I asked my wife, ‘Where do you want to go for our anniversary?’
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
‘Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!’ she said.
So I suggested, ‘How about the kitchen?’
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
___________
My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in
bed.
I turned to her and said, ‘Do you want to have sex?’
‘No,’ she answered.
I then said, ‘Is that your final answer?’
She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying ‘Yes.’
So I said, ‘Then I’d like to phone a friend.’
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
___________
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order
first..
‘I’ll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.’
He said, ‘Aren’t you worried about the mad cow?’
‘Nah, she can order for herself.’
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
___________
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping the channels.
She asked, ‘What’s on TV?’
I said, ‘Dust.’
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
___________
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3
seconds.’
I bought her a scale.
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
___________
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she
kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a
nearby table.
I asked her, ‘Do you know him?’
‘Yes,’ she sighed, ‘ He’s my old boyfriend…
I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years
ago, and I hear he hasn’t been sober since..’
‘My God!’ I said, ‘who would think a person could go on celebrating that
long?’
And that’s when the fight started . . .
__________________________________________________________________________
___________
THE BEST FOR LAST!
When our lawn mower wouldn’t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should
get it fixed.
But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck,
the car, playing golf.
Always something more important to me.
Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.
When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily
snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors.
I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.
I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a
toothbrush.
I said, ‘When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the
driveway.’
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp…
Plan is pretty clear imo.
Very mobile pack looking to make the Cheetahs fatties chase leather all day.
@VanWilder (Comment 158) :
There is a thread up for your jokes!! Keep posting!
@VanWilder (Comment 158) :
@VanWilder (Comment 158) :
Hahahaha, thanks mate, needed that!!
Here are a couple I was sent recently…
Rules of Men
Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances:
a. When a heroic dog dies to save it’s master
b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse
c. After wrecking your boss’ car.
d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into “The Crying Game”.
Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
The minimum amount of time you have to wait for a guy who’s running late is 5 minutes.
Maximum waiting time: 6 minutes.
For a girl, you have to wait 10 minutes for every point of hotness she scores on the classic 1-10 scale.
Moaning about the brand of free beer in a Mates fridge is forbidden. Gripe at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man (in fact, even remembering your Mate’s birthday is strictly optional).
On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing.
It is permissible to quaff a fruity chick drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach….and it’s delivered by a topless supermodel…and it’s free.
Unless you’re in prison, never fight naked.
Friends don’t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
If a man’s zipper is down, that’s his problem—you didn’t see nothin’.
Women who claim they “love to watch sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much beer as the other sports watchers.
You must offer heartfelt and public condolences over the death of a girlfriend’s cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.
A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both. That’s just plain mean.
________________________________________________________________________
A South African was sitting with an Australian and a Kiwi in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled barrel of beer watching a game of rugby, when all of a sudden, Saudi police entered and arrested them.
They were initially sentenced to death but they contested this and were finally imprisoned for life. But, as it was a national holiday, the Sheik decided they should be released after receiving 20 lashes of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik suddenly said: “It’s my first wife’s birthday today, and she asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping.”
So the Kiwi guy thought for a while and then said: “Please tie a pillow to my back.” This was done but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through.
The Australian, watching the scene, said: “Please fix two pillows on my back”. But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again.
Before the South African could say something, the Sheik turned to him and said: “As you are from a beautiful country, and your rugby and cricket teams are terrific, and your women beautiful you can have two wishes!”.
“Thank you, Most Royal and Merciful Highness”, The South African replies. “My first wish is: I would like to have 40 lashes.”
“If you so desire”, the Sheik replies with a questioning look on his face, “and your second wish?”
“Tie the Aussie to my back.”
________________________________________________________________________
A south African “Boer” Rugby Supporter walks into the local bar to watch a game, and to his surprise, he sees a little Japanese man sitting on the chair he always occupies when he watches rugby.
“You is sitting op my stoel” he shouts. In a split second the Jap is up and Knocks the Supporter out.
After a few minutes the supporter regains consciousness and asks. “What was that ?” “Zat, martial art from my country, Japan” replies the Japanese guy as he walks out.
The next week the rugby supporter returns to watch another game and sees the same guy sitting in “his” chair.
Enranged he shouts: “You is alweer sitting op my stoel”.
Before anyone can blink, the Japanese bloke is up and again knocks him out.
As he wakes up he again asks “What was that ?”
“Zat, karate from my country, Japan” replies our junior ninja.
The following week for the finals the rugby supporter comes prepared and, true to form, the Japanese guy is occupying the same chair as before.
“So, you is sitting so wragtig alweer op my stoel, VAT SO,” says the supporter and knocks the Jap out with one punishing blow.
When he regains consciousness the little Jap asks: “What was that ?”
“That my china, was an Isuzu 2.8 litre turbo diesel bakkie wheelspanner also from your country, Japan !”
________________________________________________________________________
An irritated wife had complained for weeks that her husband was spending all of his free time in a bar watching rugby,so he finally took her along with him. “What’ll you have?” he asked.
“Oh, I don’t know.” She thought for a long moment.
“Oh, just the same as you, I guess.” So the husband ordered them each a shot of Jack Daniel’s, tossing his back in one gulp.
His wife watched this, then took a small sip from her own shotglass, immediately spitting it back out. “Ick! That’s terrible! I don’t know how you can drink this stuff!”
“Well, there you go,” the husband cried. “And you’ve been thinking I’m out enjoying myself every night!”
Have an awesome weekend all!
Sharks by 8, even with that dodgy looking line-up, lets hope that Plum was playing games and a couple changes are made before kick-off…
@Mole (Comment 162) : Hilarious dude!!
@Ice (Comment 95) : is my cheque in the post
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 110) : on mine too. perhaps the transformation to doomsdayworld.co.za has begun
@VanWilder (Comment 158) : & others
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 108) : It’s like Henry Ford said, you can have any colour car as long as it is black.
It is the same for Ferrari, you can have any colour Ferrari as long as it is RED.
oh my what went on when i went off the jokes are good will find one and post but rugby is going to be on by then maybe tomorrow
Promoting an office
A psychotherapist was having a roaring business since he started from scratch. So much so that he could now afford to have a proper shop banner advertising his wares. So he told a kid to paint the sign board for him & put it above his shop entrance.
But, instead of his business building up, it began to slacken. He had especially noticed the ladies shying away from his shop after reading the sign board. So he decided to check it out himself. Then he understood why !
The boy found a small wooden board so he had split the word into the 3 words :
Psycho-
the-
rapist.
Blondes change a bulb
Three blondes are attempting to change a light bulb. One of them decides to call 911:
Blonde: We need help. We’re three blondes changing a light bulb.
Operator: Hmmmmm. You put in a fresh bulb?
Blonde: Yes.
Operator: The power in the house in on?
Blonde: Of course.
Operator: And the switch is on?
Blonde: Yes, yes.
Operator: And the bulb still won’t light up?
Blonde: No, it’s working fine.
Operator: Then what’s the problem?
Blonde: We got dizzy spinning the ladder around, and we all fell and hurt ourselves.
An ice fishing blonde
A blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing to make good use of her gift. Early the next morning, she got all her gear together and headed out to the ice.
When she reached her final destination, she cut a large hole in the ice and dipped the rod in. Then suddenly she heard a voice that said: “There are no fish in there”.
So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, but then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish in there.
So she moves again, and the voice tells her there are no fish in there. So she looks up and sees an irritated man staring down at her.
“How do you know there are no fish there?” asks the blonde.
So the man cooly says “Well first of all, this is a hockey rink, and second of all, you’re going to have to pay for those holes.”
Lol chazzie.. You mat be late, and we have a seperate thread for jokes now, but they still crackers..
@Richard Ferguson (Comment 172) : thanks
The team on Boots & All is different then the one posted here.
15. Ludik
14. Pietersen
13. Terblanche (c)
12. Lambie
11. Mvovo
10. Meyer
9. Mcleod
8. Daniel
7. Rhodes
6. Botes
5. Hargreaves
4. Sykes
3. Herbst
2. Burden
1. Cilliers
16. Cooper
17. Mtawarira
18. Van Staden
19. Alberts
20. Deysel
21. Pienaar
22. Strauss
@Jarson (Comment 174) : thats only 8, 7 and 5 thats different though
@Jarson (Comment 174) :
coulda been a late change, but the team we have is the team as it still appears on Sharksrugby.
@KSA Shark © (Comment 176) : or they are making up their own squads
@Jarson (Comment 177) : Hehehehehhehe